


Certain Regrettable Decisions

by BotchedExperiment



Category: LazyTown
Genre: Fluff, Guilt, Hospitals, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Poison, Sickfic, a little fluff at least, sick sportacus
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-03
Updated: 2017-02-13
Packaged: 2018-09-21 17:56:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9560423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BotchedExperiment/pseuds/BotchedExperiment
Summary: Robbie didn't mean for it to be this bad and now he has to make things right.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Lol torturing these men is my passion now  
> Thanks, Megan

"He'll feel so tired and disgusting that he won't even be able to get out of bed!" Robbie chuckled excitedly to himself as he filled a glass vial with the nearly-toxic liquid that was sure to render the obnoxious hero _useless._ He'd been working on this particular project for days.

Robbie was no scientist - no way - but he knew people _very_ skilled at finding things to inject fruit with - things like programmable illnesses and people like his brother, who more-than-happily complied when he heard Robbie's request.

Robbie was so proud of himself he giggled with delight. A few days without Sportaflippity-flop running around was just what he needed. No more loud games echoing around in his lair, no more annoying kids following Sportaflop's every move and calling his name.

It was the perfect plan.

He syringed the liquid with care and inserted it into an apple identical to those that grew in town. The plan was beautiful in its structure. The stupid hero couldn’t merely pass up on an apple, especially if it was given to him by one of the children.

Now, Robbie only needed to find one of those little twerps.

"It's disguise time!" He announced happily before spinning into a farmer costume. The costume was complete with coveralls, a straw hat, and a basket of fake apples, and it was sure to trick anyone in town.

He went on his way into town, acting as if her were taking a stroll. He continued to walk until he came across the Pink Girl in the sports field who was throwing a ball into the net-thing.

"Excuse me, little girl," he called. He bit back a smile as she looked his direction.

"Yes?" she approached him, carrying her ball under her arm.

"I picked some apples from my orchard and I wanted to give this beautiful fruit to Sportafl- ah, Sportacus. But I can't seem to find him anywhere!" He pulled the apple from his basket and her eyes widened. He didn’t know what good fruit was supposed to look like, but Robbie assumed that he had injected a most irresistible-looking apple.

"It's okay! I can give it to him!" she took the apple from his loose grip and dropped it in her little pink bag. "He's supposed to play basketball with us later, so I was just practicing."

"Yes, yes that's wonderful. Just give it to him, alrighty?"

She raised an eyebrow.

"Ahem, I mean . . . thank you."

"No problem, mister." she went back to her sports and Robbie bounced up and down excitedly as her back was turned.

This was sure to work. It wasn’t a permanent solution to getting rid of the annoying hero, but it was enough to keep him bedridden for a while - long enough for Robbie to get a nice nap in. He hadn't slept in days and all he needed was a little shut-eye. Really, Sportacus was forcing this situation on himself by making everything so loud that Robbie had no _choice_ but to do what he had just done.

He returned to his lair and got into his sleep clothes. He eagerly watched through his periscope, for hours it seemed, until he saw Sportacus backflipping into the court. The hero's greeting echoed painfully throughout Robbie's bunker. Ugh, he couldn’t wait until this guy went away.

"Shall we start the game?" Sportacus asked the kids, bouncing up and down.

"Yeah!" The kids said in unison.

"No, not yet," Robbie hissed. But Pink Girl came to his rescue.

"Sportacus, wait!"

"Yes, Stephanie?"

"I have an apple for you!"

Robbie smirked as Sportacus accepted the apple.

"Thank you! That's just what I needed."

_Don’t be so sure, Sportagloop._

Excited shivers ran through Robbie's body as he watched the hero take a big ol' bite of the apple. And . . .

Nothing happened.

Huh. Well, that was disappointing.

Robbie was going to need to have a conversation with Glanni about the quality of the products he recommends. This won't do.

The villain went back to his chair and pouted, crossing his arms with a sigh. This was supposed to be _the_ plan, the one that worked, that would get Sportacus out of his hair for a bit. Maybe he had been thinking too big before. He hadn't been able to succeed in getting Sportacus to leave _forever,_ but getting him away temporarily seemed possible, tangible. But Robbie must have been wrong.

_"Sportacus, are you alright?"_

_"Are you having a meltdown?"_

_"No he's not. He would have passed out!"_

The little voices caught Robbie's attention. A pang of hope swelled in him as he jumped out of his chair and ran back to his periscope. Just as he had wished for, Sportacus looked pale and ill. He waved dismissively at the kids and took a seat on the wall that surrounded the sports area. He breathed heavily, beads of sweat forming on his forehead while he placed a hand on his stomach with a pained expression. It was that moment that Robbie's faith in his brother was immediately restored.

"I'm fine, kids," he assured with an exhale. "I'm - suddenly I'm not feeling so well. I think I'm going to have to play with you all some other time, okay?" He got disappointed 'okay's in response as Sportacus walked off to the ladder of his airship.

"Perfect!" Robbie sing-songed to himself. He turned from his periscope and jumped up and down in delight. "Now he'll be ill long enough that I can get some sleep!"

\-----

Robbie settled himself onto a bench in the park the next day. The sun was hidden just enough that he didn’t need to worry about it being too bright, and it was just warm enough that he didn’t need a blanket. The gloomy, humid day was perfect.

There were no children in sight. Robbie assumed they were inside Poodle's house playing video games or watching a movie now that they didn’t have Sportadork to lead their sports games or remind them to eat fruit. And finally, Robbie could sleep.

It was a nice nap while it lasted. The villain found himself being awoke by small fingers poking at his face and shoulder. He growled, not bothering to open his eyes.

"What do you brats want?"

The silence that followed had Robbie curious enough to open one eye. The kids were standing in front of his napping bench, anxiously fidgeting with their hands and rocking back and forth on their heels. Something was wrong, and Robbie knew just what was making them look so . . . worried.

"Sportacus hasn’t come down since yesterday."

Robbie groaned and turned away from them. "He doesn’t actually live in Lazytown, you know, Pinky. Not really." Of course, he also never seemed to leave, either.

"Yeah but . . ."

"He hasn’t returned our letters, either!" Pickle added.

"Yeah!" Stephanie said. "No one's heard from him."

Robbie gave a sigh so deep he felt as if he was exhaling his entire existence. "That's not my problem."

"But! None of us are allowed to climb his airship ladder. And you're a grown-up, so if could just check on him and then-"

"I _said_ ," Robbie snapped, opening his eyes and turning to face them. "Not. My. Problem."

Their faces fell.

"Now, go away."

They did.

\-----

The next few days were the most relaxing days Robbie Rotten had experienced in years. He was able to sleep and eat in peace. The children hadn't played outside since Sportacus went up to his dumb balloon and it was _heaven_. But . . .

Robbie was getting curious. He didn’t think the illness was supposed to last quite this long, and if he were going to be completely honest, he would admit that the town felt sort of empty without Sportacus around for Robbie to complain to (and about).

Maybe the kids were right to be worried.

Ugh! What was he thinking? He finally rid the town of the man he'd hated for years! Robbie couldn’t let himself get all soft and mushy now. This should be a success for him to celebrate. So, celebrate he did.

Robbie created himself a delicious slice of cake. He eagerly took the first bite, but it didn’t taste as good as it usually did. Was there something wrong with his machine? No, it looked fine. There was something wrong with _him_.

Robbie sighed and set down the plate of sugary goodness that he normally enjoyed more than life itself. Success was overrated. He needed that stupid hero back. 

Robbie begrudgingly left his peaceful lair and ventured into the town that was constantly causing him irritation. There was no one in sight, everything just as empty as he had left it when he went inside a few days ago. It was like an eerie ghost town. And all because Sportacus was gone? Sure, the guy had a big influence on the town, but not _this_ big. No way! Something fishy was going on.

That's when he spotted Stephanie sitting on her front steps, looking as gloomy as ever. She sat up from her slumped position when she spotted Robbie and he realized it was too late to walk away unnoticed.

"Robbie! Did you hear?"

"Did I hear what, Pinky?" he mumbled, trying his best to look uninterested.

"Sportacus is in the hospital!"

Oh. Oh God. Robbie's heart fell right into his stomach. His bored expression must've faltered as he looked at her, because she frowned more deeply.

"You didn’t know?"

"I-"

"He got really sick. They said he was poisoned!"

That was definitely not what Robbie had intended. He mentally panicked, trying to figure out how in the world this could have happened. Before he knew it, she was staring at him.

"Did you do this?"

" _me?!_ " Robbie screeched. "Pinky, I'm _hurt_." he placed a hand over his heart and slumped, much to her irritation.

"I don’t believe you, Robbie! He's really hurting!"

"Now, hold on a minute there, you little twerp. I had no part in this. He's constantly eating dumb sportscandy, who knows what other poisons he ingests!" He lied through his teeth.

She scowled at him, scrunching up her nose and turning back inside her uncle's home.

So Robbie knocked on the door.

Luckily, it was the mayor who answered instead of his much smarter niece, and Robbie managed to get the information out of him. Enough to find Sportacus, at least. Robbie wasn’t sure why he was doing this, maybe to figure out what went wrong?

Yes, that was it. All he needed to do was see what shape Sportacus was in so Robbie would know how to improve this particular scheme in the future. Not because he felt concerned or guilty or anything dumb like that, of course.

Off to the hospital in the name of science and villainy!

\-----

Robbie had forgotten how much he hated hospitals. They smelled weird, and people were constantly moving and rushing around. Everyone was sick or injured or in a hurry and there were too many people and he despised it. He felt small in a place so big. It was only a small town hospital, much smaller than other hospitals, but it didn’t make it any less scary.

It wasn’t as busy as he had expected, Robbie realized with relief. It would probably be easy for him to just ask about Sportacus at the desk, but what fun would that be? Instead he snuck into the hallway from the empty waiting room and walked until he saw his bedridden enemy.

Sportacus was pale, dark circles under his dull, red rimmed eyes. Oh, this was not what he wanted, not at all. Robbie couldn’t believe that he was responsible for things going so wrong, but wasn’t he always? Ugh. He couldn’t believe that he felt guilty.

Robbie assumed that Sportacus was asleep until his eyes opened at the sound of his footsteps.

"Robbie," He slurred tiredly.

Robbie had never seen him so still.

He stared uneasily at the IV in the man's arm, all of the things he was attached to. Robbie swallowed hard. He did this.

The villain raised a hand and waved awkwardly in the doorway.

A little smile tugged at the edge of Sportacus' lips. "You can come in, you know."

Robbie walked in, letting out a breath he didn’t know he had been holding. He still stayed a safe distance from the hospital bed. Finally, he attempted to regain his confidence, standing up straight and pushing away his shame.

"It wasn’t meant to poison you. I just thought that I should say that."

The smile disappeared without a trace. "You did this?"

The little trust Sportacus had harbored for Robbie had left his eyes in an instant, making Robbie's stomach twist with guilt.

"Robbie . . ." he frowned. "That's really hurtful."

Robbie didn’t want this. He wanted Sportacus to be sick, sure, but he didn’t want - _this._ He didn’t want to cause the hero actual pain and suffering, that wasn’t how Robbie worked! That was how-

That was how Glanni worked.

Robbie was definitely going to have _words_ with his brother.

Robbie stared at Sportacus, who looked like his heart had been torn from his chest. He was already bedridden, in pain, and now he had to find out that someone he trusted had done this to him. The villain shifted his weight from one foot to the other.

"This isn't what I intended," he admitted pitifully.

Sportacus gave a small, knowing nod. "It never is, is it, Robbie." it wasn’t a question.

"No, it's not."

"And you came here to do what? Explain your actions?"

"No, Sportanerd, I came to-" he stopped himself. He couldn’t keep up this façade, not when he felt genuinely guilty. He exhaled. "I'm sorry."

Sportacus' mouth pressed into a thin line. He stared holes into man in front of him, squinting momentarily as if he were trying to figure Robbie out, to see if he could really trust what the villain said.

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Are you sure?"

". . . Yes."

The hero's eyes widened, eyebrows raised as if this was the most unexpected thing that had happened today.

"Thank you, Robbie. That . . . means a lot to me."

Robbie nodded a welcome as he cleared his throat. "I'll let you rest or whatever."

"Wait," Sportacus said. "Please stay for a while."

Those words stopped Robbie in his tracks.

Sportacus' eyes shifted to his lap, tapping his finger on the bed to release the small amount of pent up energy he had in him.

"I really don't like hospitals," The hero admitted wearily.

Robbie took a seat in the chair next to the bed. He smiled a bit.

"Me either."

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol I don't know what i'm doing

 

Sportacus scolds Robbie when he sneaks back in after visiting hours. He wasn’t about to let some stranger make him leave, and he needs more time to figure out what his brother had done.

From what Robbie heard, Sportacus is on the mend. And that's . . . Good? He isn't sure how to feel.

Robbie is only glad that he got his extra sleep in while the hero was incapacitated, because he's going to be awake for the next week trying to make sure that this doesn’t happen again. His brother would never apologize, of course, and Robbie wouldn’t expect him to. But, that’s not going to stop him from calling him up and giving him a piece of his well-rested mind in the near future.

Robbie is preoccupied with his own thoughts and the humming hospital machinery when Sportacus' own weak hand takes his, squeezing it. The villain blinks at the hand holding his, as if it came out of nowhere. For a minute, he wonders whether Sportacus feels warm from fever of if that's just how warm he usually is.

He wants to ask what in the world Sportacus thinks he's doing, holding hands with his enemy, but the hero looks so relaxed with Robbie's hand in his.

How did this happen?

"It really was a mistake, wasn’t it?" Sportacus' voice was slurred with impending sleep.

Robbie clears his throat. "It was."

"Are you going to tell me what you did to me?" The hero asks. He shifts his position in the bed to turn to Robbie, wincing and placing a hand over his stomach as he does.

Robbie gulps nervously. He doesn’t want to bring Glanni into this, to explain to Sportacus that he has a brother who is much more . . . spirited than he is. Robbie learned everything he knew from his big brother, but attempted homicide wasn’t one of them.

"I don’t . . . actually know," He admits.

Sportacus' eyes widen. He wasn’t expecting that answer. His eyebrows knit together with worry. Robbie realizes only then that this man is genuinely fearing, as if Sportacus is giving himself this one moment to worry about _himself._

"Robbie, be honest with me." He squeezes Robbie's hand pleadingly and it makes the villain feel that much more guilty about the fact that he has no idea what he had tricked Sportacus into ingesting. Sportacus is still alive, though, and that means whatever it was wasn’t supposed to be fatal, right?

"I am being honest, Sportastupid. But you're fine! So why does it matter?" He babbled, shifting his gaze to the tiled floor.

Sportacus stares at him with concern, eyes sparkling with a sleepy glaze, lighting up the darkened hospital room. Fucking puppy-dog eyes. Robbie can't believe this.

He sighs, slumping his shoulders in a _fine, I give in!_ manner. "Maybe," Sportacus' face lights up as soon as Robbie adds on. "If you tell me what happened before you showed up here, I can uh- figure out what this is." he vaguely gestures toward Sportacus as he says 'this'.

"Thank you, Robbie!" A voice from the hall shushes him. He whispers out an apology and turns to Robbie with a lower voice. "I do have one question for you before we begin."

"Yes?"

"Am I going to be alright?"

Robbie's stomach twists with guilt. How is he supposed to know?

The hope on this man's face is overwhelming, though.

"Yes. You're going to be fine."

Sportacus let out a sigh of relief, a big grin on his face. He proceeds to answer every question Robbie asks him about the progression of his symptoms.

Robbie's amazed to hear that the hero made it so far after eating the apple, not only making it to his airship, but climbing the damn ladder. Once Sportacus realized that this was something more than a simple illness, he even climbed _back down_ and walked himself to Lazytown's doctor's office. Impressive. Robbie would have accepted his fate and made funeral arrangements had he been in the same situation.

"I could hardly move because I was in so much pain," Sportacus explains, placing a hand on his stomach for clarification. "I was very dizzy, as well. I couldn’t see straight. And then they brought me here," he says the last sentence with a bit of sadness.

Sportacus definitely doesn’t fit in here at the hospital. Beside his post-poison appearance, he's a rather healthy looking guy. Robbie can see himself ending up here, though, because he's obviously not as healthy as the stupid sports elf. Oh well, one self-deprecating thought at a time.

Robbie would be absolutely gleeful hearing about his enemy's anguish if the guy didn’t look like a dog confined to the pound. The machines he's attached to only add to his restrained appearance. Pathetic. But he's not going to have sympathy for Sportacus! He apologized already!

Then . . . why is he trying to help? Why does he feel guilty? Ugh, being introspective is too much work. Robbie shakes the deeps thoughts from his head. He's just going to have to accept that he's a better person than Glanni, which isn't hard at all.

Robbie hums thoughtfully after Sportacus finishes his explanation, slowly realizing that he knows exactly what Glanni did to the town hero.

Oh dear.

"Well?" Sportacus urges.

"You'll be fine. it's fine. Everything's _perfectly fine._ " Robbie pulls his hand from Sportacus' and uses both hands to massage his head. Oh God.

"Is it, Robbie? You don’t seem so sure," the hero says with a nervous chuckle.

"Yes!" Probably.

His mind goes back to just a little while ago. " _Robbie, be honest with me."_

_"No, I don’t want to,"_ Robbie replies to Sportacus' voice in his head.

Robbie had seen the poison used before with much more disastrous results. Sportacus is lucky he's so in touch with his own body or he would probably be in horrible shape.

"Good," Sportacus says with relief. He stifles a yawn. "I think I'm going to sleep."

"Oh, okay. Me too." Robbie shimmies around in the chair to get comfortable and then looks up to see Sportacus staring at him with a raised eyebrow. "What?"

"You don’t have to stay, you know. In fact, you're not actually supposed to be here."

"Do you want me to leave?"

A smile tugs at the man's lips. "No, I don’t."

"Then I'm staying."

\-----

Robbie doesn’t realize that he had fallen asleep until he's woken by the most annoying beeping sound he's ever heard in his life.

That's not hospital equipment.

Sportacus stirs in the bed before sitting up hastily. "Someone's in trouble!"

Sportacus doesn’t waste any time putting on his superhero clothes. The villain doesn’t have a chance to grab him and forcibly push him back onto the bed before the hero is pulling himself away from the machines he's attached to and running out of the hospital.

He gets around well for a guy who had his stomach pumped, Robbie will give him that.

The confused questions of hospital staff echo throughout the hall as Robbie calmly stands from the uncomfortable chair, taking a deep breath, and following the crazy hero. Sportacus may be in good shape, but he can't get far in his current condition.

He strolls down the hall at his own pace. Robbie's in no hurry. He'll come across Sportacus in no time.


End file.
